I have to rebuild my account. I liked looking at how my images grew in likes and faves. Or how the tags might have changed.

It’s like I lost a whole empire…

I miss them

@Shavkat Rakhmonov
Yeah, I’m not a fan of those people either

@Moving
You will keep losing if you don’t have the proper mindset to go through.
I don’t know much about you but to be honest I would like to and losing everything on one’s hand isn’t a good sign.

Hope this awful experience helps you in some way. U_u
You are very talented. ^ ^

@WojTek-ツ
He’s a wonderful artist.

But also batshit crazy like many young artist

Man, I really felt for Misty in the last episode.

@TheHappySpaceman
I’m really sorry, dude. I lost my dog a year ago, he was with me since I was nine years old as well and the fact that he’s gone still feels unreal to me, still think about him all the time. Make sure to cherish the good memories you’ve had with Dina, that’s helped me quite a bit in my case.

[cough, cough]

Ok, it’s been more than three months of this bullshit, so excuse me, but …

Then, after you do indeed demand a complete and total takedown and anonymization of all your uploads, again, and I spend 2.5 hours manually taking care of getting everything exactly as you demanded, again…

Maybe stop blaming everyone else every time the thing you demand actually happens exactly the way you demanded it.

@Ciaran
I’m not. I’m mourning my loss, knowing it was all done for a good reason

@Moving
There was no good reason. We will always merge low quality screencaps from the show into high quality duplicates of the same frame. We aren’t going to change that.

@Ciaran
I meant removing everything I’ve uploaded. It sucks, but it was all for a good reason, since I’m moving to a fresh account. Where I’ll only upload Fanart and physical edits. I would ask to move all my art to that account but… too late

Thought I was gonna be happy here

But goes to show if it’s too good to be true. It likely is

@Moving
Selavi

You genuinely were, until you blew everything up.

Please reread what others have said to you. Some of it is really good advice.

@Ciaran
Example?

Also. I told you I had to go offline and left so I couldn’t respond till the next day. and I told you I was not gonna leave. If you were confused, you would have asked me to stay online a little longer or waited till I returned

@Waldo.
Nice :) I didn’t know that one.

Personally, though, I prefer Samsara.

Oh my god…

I fucking hate it when people criticizes you for not doing things in your life that is 100% purely Filipino because of the fact that it’s today’s the Independence Day, like, they’d say:

-Why are you listening to Eminem? Go listen to our Filipino rappers because our musicians don’t get the recognition to the world it deserves.

-Why are you eating burgers? Go eat our Sinigang instead because we need to make our food popular to the world!

-Why are you speaking English?! How dare you turn your back on our very own mother tongue! Speak Filipino because it’s our Independence Day.

-Why do you like things in your life that arent made in the Philippines?! You’re not a real Filipino and don’t you dare celebrate our Independence Day if you arent acting liek one.

Kinda miffed right now because my Roblox avatar was ruined because the layered jacket (black with white stripes on the sleeves and a white inside) I was wearing got deleted for some reason, so instead of looking sleek, my outfit now feels… empty. Shame too, since it was actually an outfit I decided to settle on for a change, but nope, can’t have nice things - I got a temp outfit (not the one in the image) set up in the meantime, but still…

Don’t ask me why my fedora (it’s the “Perfectly Legitimate Business Hat”) and hot cocoa aren’t textured here, it’s just a Roblox site glitch.

@Shavkat Rakhmonov
Honestly, keep celebrating your own way & don’t let anyone keep you from doing so.

I have been asking you to consider staying. For three months. Ever since the last time you did exactly this same thing.

Plus you’re posting stuff like this and this all over the site, and then there’s THIS still ongoing nightmare which for some reason you are still being incredibly passive-aggressive about.

Then yesterday you opened a report that was so specific that anyone on staff would have worked without even checking with you about it.

The only reason I wrote to you about it is because it was such a perfect match for your OTHER requests that I’ve been trying to get resolution on for months that I wanted to find out if it was ok if we just did the easy - three minutes and then we’re done - version. Or if you required me to spend HOURS getting everything exactly the way you wanted it.

Turns out I could have done the three minute version.

Look.

If you want to leave, that’s fine - go ahead and leave.

You and your art will be missed. Doing your takedown really hurt, knowing that was the last time I’m likely to ever see some of your artwork. There’s examples in your portfolio of images that I think are the best examples of that character. Now none of us will be able to share those images with anyone else here in the forums or get inspiration from them ourselves. I don’t know why you wanted that - but you are the artist. Your rights are retained and if you demand that we delete all of your images, we do. Sure, I’ll spend months trying to change your mind, but I’m not going to act directly against your wishes.

But stop asking us to delete everything and then complaining when we do. This has happened too many times and I’m pretty sure that given what happened THIS time you’re going to have a pretty hard time finding a volunteer to spend hours or weeks talking with you. It’s clear that doesn’t lead to anything other than more accusations, complaints, and acting out.

If you still want the GDPR wipe then report your profile for a reason of “Other” and someone else will take care of it.

FWIW I get it - you’re young and you have a boat load of issues that you’re struggling with. And none of it is the kind of thing you can self-medicate or fix by chatting with others online. Please get professional help. This is the kind of stuff that can just keep getting worse and worse, so the sooner you can get it managed, the better.

So - take care of yourself. You’re free of this site now, go fly and do whatever it is that made you want to get to this point so hard.

No more struggles. It’s done.

For other sites, I recommend trying all of them at the same time. One of them will stand out as being better, and then you can move there.

@Ciaran
Thanks for your time in writing this whole emotional and yet straightforward letter to Moving.
I hope he doesn’t leave us. He is an interesting and talented fellow. U.u

I kinda guess all of his acting up wasn’t normal. So, I’m very satisfied on how you approach with this. Nice and good Mod!
( T_T)＼(^-^ )
You have done well.

I am today years old to learn that the capital city of United Arab Emirates is actually Abu Dhabi, not Dubai.

I feel dumb oh Allah… 😔

I very much agree. But I’m also concerned that staying might not be the best thing for them, either.

Sometimes people have to leave a place that they were making their home, and abandon everyone who were a big piece of their emotional support, before they can figure out what they really wanted and just be ok with “being ok”.

I do want whatever is best for them. And right now, it doesn’t seem like being here is any kind of “best” for them.

It actually, really, is not unusual here. We have a lot of people who are going through similar things. A lot of people who are often some of the nicer and more awesome people to be around, who two or four times a year kind of start flipping tables, because their bipolar flips or they can’t afford their meds or some drama in their life ramps up their anxiety so far they can’t manage their own stress.

Adrenaline, dopamine, cortisol, serotonin, melatonin, GABA and acetylcholine - so many different neurotransmitter chemicals all dancing in an incredibly delicate balancing act.

Anxiety, drama, the feeling of loss of control can get so bad that sometimes people feel like they don’t even have control over their own bodies.

Personally? I practice Shugendo. The religious practice part of it involves walking up mountains for hours without a break, or sitting naked in snow banks or under freezing waterfalls, or meditating in tiny dark huts with hot chillies smoking on a brazier until you feel like hell itself is sweating out of your eyeballs. Kind of like the old American Indian sweat lodges - you do it not for yourself but for everyone on the planet.

But, the way I look at it is that most of it is just a kind of personal drama that we create to get our neurotransmitters balanced, and so we can tell ourselves we really are in control of at least something.

The search for “There’s something I can do”. Or, “This - this thing right here - this is real”.

Take the religion out of it, and a lot of it is a kind of social cutting. Hurting yourself to show that you are in control of at least that one thing. Kneeling for hours in prayer, or cults that whip themselves in penance - all of it has a biological affect, and the simple handles for those things is almost always anxiety and drama - some sort of fight or flight response to pain, and the endurance of it in a tightly controlled social setting.

Drama is a hell of a drug. Or, it helps us regulate the hellscape of drugs that make up our day-to-day personalities.

So, when people ask to have everything destroyed - when they flip a table and scream that they want everything blown up and no one cares or understands them - that’s a familiar scene from a movie I’ve watched too many times myself this lifetime.

It’s not usually this far, and usually I or one of the other volunteers can help people get through it behind the scenes.

But once someone starts publicly posting about how angry they are that we won’t just delete all their images, then that’s usually where we need to just do what they are asking us to do.

Even if it seems like the least helpful thing in the universe.

For me, the scary part is that this usually means that people are cutting off their primary, or one of their primary, coping mechanisms.

It’s kind of like if someone is embarrassed that they masterbate every day. They think it’s naughty and they want to stop. But doing it is how they keep their neurotransmitters balanced. It helps them cope with stress and anxiety, and makes it possible for them to lead an otherwise completely normal life of getting up, going to work, paying their bills, not acting out around others. But they’re so embarrassed they stop masterbating. And then everything goes to hell for them because they stop doing the one thing that was keeping them on an even keel.

You can substitute smoking, or cutting yourself, or binging one show over and over, or over eating, or purging, or painting miniatures, or attending raves all night, or sky diving, or racing cars, or playing drums (sarcastic lmao) or any of the other crazy things that people do that helps them stay balanced but that they keep thinking; “Maybe I shouldn’t be doing this any more”.

If it helps them cope, then it helps them cope. And until they have a MORE EFFECTIVE coping mechanism, they should continue to use it.

If it’s something life threatening, something that is self-harming, you hope they’ll find a more effective coping mechanism really fast. But sometimes those most dangerous coping mechanisms are incredibly effective, and it takes a while to get something else ramped up to the point where it provides the same level of benefit.

So, for me, when people cut all ties with their friends, or their community, or their art, it feels like maybe they’re cutting off something that was helping them cope, and helping them “be ok”.

Like, when people are embarrassed (but massively helped) by drawing a particular character, or a specific fetish - if it helps them be ok, then for me it’s good.

And being ok with being ok because of something that embarrasses you can be hard.

So - yea … Being ok is hard sometimes. It can hurt worse than the thing you’re doing to hurt yourself.

But if you can do it - if you can just “be ok” - then that really is a pretty healthy place to be.

Sorry for the long rant, I might just be dumping at this point so I’m going to go back to getting my drawing studio fixed and working again.

I caught a cold and my fridge broke down. It’s sort of fixed, but not making ice anymore.

@Lord WyrmSpawN
I’ve never had a fridge that makes ice ever.